My little ballerina

I was going through my photo albums looking for a picture to show someone and came across this page. I wanted to scan the photos but it would have ruined the page so sorry for the poor quality but I had to add this to my blog.
Mandy was ten years old here she had always loved dancing. I am not sure where that love came from because her father and I do not dance. Mandy continued into high school and took four years of dancing there and was so happy about it. She in one year of dancing choreographed a dance and performed in it for the tree lighting ceremony for the city that we lived in one year. We were so proud

Here is my baby posing for me. The outfit she is wearing is one that she had for the dance recital that she was going to be in.

When I took the first picture I said ok thank you and she said "No, Mom I have to do all the poses" My sweet baby girl

She is so happy in these pictures to show me all the positions that she had learned. My heart is filled with love thinking about how proud I was with her in every thing she did. I miss my baby girl

Believe

"Believe" was the theme that Mandy had during her time of healing and treatment. I was so amazed at her positive attitude about her healing and getting better. Mandy was always positive and up beat and happy even when we were given the time limit (which was longer than she had) she always was showing us her best side. I know that she wanted not to but we are a family of pleasers and she wanted us not to worry about her.
I found these ceramic tiles at a thrift store I snatched them up right away.

Lil cook

Mandy loved to help me with my cakes. Here she is in 1986 helping me at grans house she has a little frosting on her nose. I do not know who took this picture but I recognize that shirt that I am wearing sitting next to her so I must have been frosting the cake right then. Mandy always had such thick and long hair, this picture reminds me about the times that I would put her hair into very teeny tiny braids all over her head. she was good about sitting still for about the first fifteen minutes then her little feet would start to wiggle with the wanting to go play but she was very patient about sitting still even then. I can remember as Mandy grew up that she wanted to learn how to decorate cakes with me but as far as cooking goes she always told me that she was going to be rich enough that she would not need to cook and would have a hired chief to do that for her. I remember trying to teach her how to cut up a whole fryer for the first time and she gagged and had to leave the room she was in junior high. As time when on she could eventually watch and I kept trying to teach her how to cut up a fryer so that she could cook one for her husband but she kept insisting that her chief would do that for her so I gave up. As she became a woman she could cook very well and made all kinds of things but chicken was not on that list too often and if it was the chicken was always cut up. Then one day she did it she was so proud of herself and had to call me and brag about cutting up her first chicken. I was so proud when I asked her how she did it she said I just remember watching and listen to you on how to cut it up. I thought to myself that it was pretty impressive she remembered. In later years when I asked why she had such an aversion to cutting up chicken she said it was to close to skin and it grossed her out. LOL, well I can understand that I felt the same way when my mother taught me.

Profile Picture

Mandy like I said before was a fan of the profile pictures and here she is driving in the Chrysler 300 the one that she just wanted to continue to drive all over the country.
They (Mandy and her husband) in this picture are driving to Nevada and at this point are in the Tahoe National Forest. Mandy's father was a stock car driver for many years and that is where Mandy got her love for driving. She would go and watch her father when he raced (I have a pic I will try and find it and post it later) And later in life she worked in a Dealership. The love of cars was passed down from father to daughter and son. Well who doesn't like to drive new and fast cars!

Mandy Bridal Shower

In this picture Mandy is sitting between her cousin and a family friend who we lost in 2010 a really sweet wonderful lady. 
This day was one of the best day's ever. We had set up a surprise bridal shower for Mandy in Reno under the disguise of having a family portrait done with the whole entire family. This would be a plan that would take super human powers to do since my family is so large and the logistics of it would be a nightmare. So we had everyone met us at my mother in laws house and we came up in two separate cars. We had her brother drive them all up and told him to take his time and go get gas and go to the store and what ever until we txtd him. Later Mandy would say that she was on him about getting to grams house so that they would not be late but no matter what she said he was dragging his feet. Well we got everyone ready and and then sent a message to her brother telling him to come. So here we all are sitting in the house waiting for them to come when they pull up. I am so excited that I cannot sit down and so I walk outside to say hurry........grams upset that you all are so late. Her expression was priceless she said, well tell your son.....he was dragging his feet it's his fault not mine! So into the house we walk and she is bombarded with "SURPRISE" and she stops and is staring at everyone trying to wrap her head around what is going on looking at all the people and just standing there. Then she said "Hi" still standing in shock. We all start laughing and I am realizing that she is still not understanding what is going on so I say "its your bridal shower" and she said "What? no pictures?" we all laugh again and I realize that she is in so much shock that I had to make her sit down and had someone bring a glass of water to her. We really have a large family and they can be overwhelming sometimes so when I ask are you okay? she said "So we are not having family pictures?" More laughter. No sweetheart I said this is a party for you. It really was a great surprise and she was so happy. Then once she started to settle down a bit she became more relaxed and less stressed. I didn't realize that her brother had made her so agitated by being late that she was upset. Poor thing going from high stress to surprise to realization to happiness all in the space of ten minutes was a little much on her but she was a great trooper as always.

Chrysler 300 and my baby girl

For her trip on their honeymoon Mandy was able to drive her dream car a Chrysler 300. I think that this was one of the many highlights that she had on her trip. She was so very excited to get going on her trip that she could hardly contain her excitement. I remember her saying that she would love to just start driving and never stop. She said I could drive all over the country and be very happy. Mandy worked at a Chrysler dealership as a warranty administrator and loved all of the brand new cars. My baby girl she really loved the nice and finer things in life

State Fair California Golden Bear

My baby girl.......
Mandy loved to have her picture taken next to things that she liked. Here she is standing next to the California golden bear at the state fair
Mandy was a person that was fun to be around and could make me smile very easily.
I can remember needing some kind of an attitude adjustment and she could do it without my knowing lol she really knew her mother.......

Halloween 2006

Here is my baby girl and her husband at our church party. Everyone was encouraged to dress up and I thought that they had great costumes. As you can see purple is Mandy's favorite color by the wig and her purse. If she had a purple dress she would have worn that too.
My baby girl I love her sweet spirit and sense of fun in and with life and all she knew.

May/June tree

This tree was to be the one for June, but as Mandy started to decline so fast (you could see changes by the minute) I had decided that I needed something to do. I could not sit, stand, read, clean, watch tv I was just too out of myself to be in my skin. So I thought that I could change the scene and it worked for a little while. But Mandy was not able to enjoy this one....She was unresponsive by this point but I did not let that stop me. I just decorated with the help of one of her very good friends and we got it done. I thought this one was really great

paper lights

aloha and palm trees

or maybe they are pineapple trees???

Nice and bright colors but after this one that was it. And as I said in earlier posts all of these trees we pulled pieces from and made her the memorial tree

And here it is

May Tree

Here is the tree for May. Mandy did not help because she was not to well so I decorated the tree. At one point she did come by and add a flower and smiling said "There I helped"
The tree was covered with Flowers because you know.....April showers bring May flowers.

I purchased some glass vases from the dollar tree and silk flowers from there also and just put them on the mantle. They were top heavy so I added some marbles on the bottom

Instead of faerie lights I just added a flower garland to the strand of lights.

We kept this decoration up all the time and just decorated it different each month

Here is a closer look at the flowers it was very pretty in person. I really need to get a better camera.....Or maybe the camera is not the problem lol

Easter Tree

Here is the tree for the month of April, it was a Easter theme. I love the Idea Mandy had here about hanging Easter eggs from ribbons and then adding curly ribbons as garland.

Welcome spring sign it was all glittery.

cute little bunnies in Mandy's favorite color of course

when we did this tree Mandy started to show some concerning signs of problems but we still did not have a diagnosis. It is really upsetting thinking about it now because the surgery was in December and we still did not know what was going on in April but as normal Mandy was a positive person and was continuing to be of the mind set that she was going to beat this thing called cancer. My baby girl always the positive thinker, just like her father. They always have a over flowing glass of water (you know the saying glass half full or empty) but me.........I say "glass?....what glass?...... I don't have a glass.... lol just kidding but I am a person to think negative before positive. I think that is why my husband is so good for me, he grounds me when I start off with the doom and gloom and puts me back on the reality train.

St. Patrick's Day Tree

This is the March tree. This was a lot of fun to decorate more so than the one for Valentines day. It could be because green is my favorite color but it looked better in person than this picture

We put up a couple mantle decorations

Here is a close up of the decorations on the tree, coins, clover, carnations and clover garland

This was so funny for the tree topper

more faerie lights

Here we two are getting the decorations ready for the tree.....
I guess I should have cleaned the couch up for the picture.... oh well if I had done that it would not be a real picture but a staged one.
Looking at this picture is bitter sweet. On one hand I feel so blessed to have this picture but I realized that at this point it would be less than two months and she would be gone. The Dr's. had not given us the diagnosis from the December surgery yet and time was already ticking. If I had known on this day what was coming I would have wrapped her in my arms and never let go.

Valentines Day Tree

I told you before about the Memorial Tree and how it came about so now I thought that over the next few days I wold show you each tree that we decorated for and with Mandy.
This one is the Valentines day tree, it has hearts on sticks that later we used to heart attack our neighbors lawn, we covered the lawn with these sticks it was so fun and they loved it.

We also used a heart garland with the hearts on a stick

We took Christmas ribbon with wire in it to wrap around the Christmas lights to make faerie lights and then strung it across the entrance.

Mandy was so cute here, she took this curly ribbon and put it where she had just had radiation and the bald spot it created to pretend it was hair. She really was a trooper because I know that it really bothered her but she did not like to let it show. Only in quiet moments when everyone else was gone would she come in to my room and we would talk. She would share her fears, sorrows and troubles. Talk about feeling helpless......

We loved this sign, it stayed up the entire time she was ill and she only used positive thoughts to help get through this disease.

Wedding picture

I love this picture of Mandy I can almost read her mind.....
This was taken just seconds after her husband pushed a piece of cake into her mouth but he was still very gentle with her as you can see. Not much cake on her mouth but she is saying "Nice......."
They had a really cute cake,not traditional but very cute

My baby girl

My baby girl on her way to becoming one of the most beautiful woman I have ever known. She was a sweet example of what kind of woman I aspire to. She was an old spirit in a young body...... I miss her soooooo much

Barbie Cake

Mandy loved Barbies so for her birthday she wanted a Barbie cake... This is what I made. She loved it so much she asked if I would take a picture of her holding it as she wanted to always remember it. This picture was taken at Grans and Gramps house in Roseville, California in their back yard. She is so sweet in this picture. I had her stand in the sun as I did not have a flash on my camera... Poor thing with the sun in her eyes. I guess I could have had her turn a bit from the sun!!!!

Hydrangea

This was Mandy's favorite flower. I love this flower too because of its size. Mandy would find some pretty silk Hydrangea's and buy them. I do not like silk flowers at all, I do not really have a reason other than I do not like them. Mandy would to tease me saying "These are better because you do not have to water them and they will not die."
At her wedding she wanted Hydrangea's but they were none in the stores available so she used roses.
I remember she came home with some one day and was so happy with them she said "these are so pretty don't you think so?" No, was my reply. Then when we went shopping if she found some Hydrangea's she would go over and admire them or purchase them if she had enough money. Mandy loved very simple but beautiful things on one hand and on the other she was an admirer of the glitz and glamorous time of Hollywood's golden age.  

Posing Just for fun

Mandy's brother had made a small Lego structure and wanted me to take a picture of it so he could take it a part. It is hard to see in this old picture but I believe that it had wheels and could race across the floor. So I told them both to come outside as I did not have a flash on this old disposable camera. This house was in Roseville at the end of a court and they loved living here.
We have a lot of memories here as we had spent a good part of their childhood years living here.
Mandy was always such a great sister to her brother. He would go to her when ever he needed any help and she was always so happy to assist him in what ever he needed! She was a good mama in training. In this picture she is giving him instructions on how to stand, look or behave i'm sure as he was always a cut up.

Pull and say

Here is Mandy and a friend. Mandy is playing with her pull and say she got for a gift. I figure she is around eight months old here. Look at that sweet little baby girl.....

Mandy and her elephants

Mandy has been a fan of the elephant every since she was a child. Today as I was contemplating as I do every morning on what to post for the day I walked passed this elephant and thought this would be a good post. Showing some of her elephants.

This elephant is very small about a inch and a half. Look at the ribbon behind it for a gauge

I love this one reaching way up into the sky. This elephant is one that I purchased for her but not till after I lost her. I found it about four months after and had to get it for her collection

Mandy loved the snow globe and this one had an elephant in it and that made it all the more special for her.

This was one of the ornaments from Mandy's Memory tree, I wish I would have remembered who sent it.

This one she had in her powder room

This one is missing its tusks but we have them somewhere. I think that this one is one of Mandy's favorite and when I asked her why she said because of its simplicity.
I guess the funny thing about the whole elephant collection is that now that Mandy is gone....... I find myself searching for cute elephants to collect and add to her collection where as before I had no desire to collect elephants or anything else for that matter. I am not sure why that is but there you go.

Rain forest cafe

I love Mandy's sweet sweet smile. To me she smiles with pure love and acceptance for life, family and friends. I miss this very much about not having her with me. She could make my heart smile by just being in the room and looking at me and simply saying "Good morning mom"
This picture was taken outside of the Rain forest cafe in the City at the pier. Mandy was so happy to take her father and I here. Although this picture was taken at a different time than that day she would come home from the city and say "You have to go with us to this cafe" so we did. Later after she passed I went with a girlfriend back there to eat one time and it was a bitter sweet visit for me. I was here in a place that meant so much to my baby and the person I was there with meant a lot to me helping me in my time of great need while she also had a great need after loosing her sweet husband. Sharing grief some times makes the pain a little easier to handle even if for a minute. Never take friendship for granted.

2012

Happy New Year!